1. Take pictures of their feet.
2. Express their extreme annoyance at this work day and hint that it deserves a much needed alcoholic beverage at the end of it. WINK WINK.
3. Thank their hubby for being the best hubby in the world while their hubby is sitting right next to them.
4. Complain about bad service at a fine dining establishments. “Never eating at Applebee’s AGAIN!”
5. Express their extreme excitement to see their best friends tonight, Britney, Whitney, and Sarah!!! LOVE YOU LADIES!!
6. Take pictures wearing a lot of makeup and looking really preppy while simultaneously making a “hard” facial expression and holding up what they consider to be a gangster sign. Potential caption: ‘Straight thuggin.’

7. Take pictures of undeserving food.

8. Make their status the song lyrics of any Kings of Leon Song.
9. Take a picture of someone they deem inferior to themselves in some way with the question: Really?
10. Write angry letters to companies (Dear EZ PARK, I hate you!), unorganized groups of people (Dear slutty freshmen who think that leggings can be worn as pants..), and non-entities (Dear unseasonably cold weather, WTF?!)
11. Subtly yell at no one in particular while being very specific. “Wow, it’s hard to believe that you think you know someone and then they turn around and STAB YOU IN THE BACK. Will never make that mistake again. EVER.”
12. Document exceedingly mundane activites for the day. “Getting my oil changed today. Then getting much needed groceries. Then it’s off to the post office to return a package. Then stopping by the gyno. Will probably need some gas by the end, so I may stop at the gas station. But I might be tired so I’ll probably just get it in the morning on my way to pick up a prescription. But if I’m not very tired I’ll probably just get the gas on the way home. Again, unless I am tired.”
13. Express their distaste for facebook on facebook and threaten to leave facebook to their facebook friends.
14. Ask seemingly rhetorical questions. “It’s cool to do a bunch of meth and babysit 20 six year olds, right? Hehe.”
15. Write a status in another language. Parce que, Je suis tres intelligente!!
Love,
Mary. A white girl on facebook, guilty of most of these things.
**My friend Matt Damon (aka Kaitlin) collaborated on the trends of facebook with me. A much more detailed version will be in our book we’re writing. Which will be published….one day…



This is a blatantly racist list
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I am now requesting a list of 10 things black people like to do on facebook lol.
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does it include copy pasta rap lyrics 50 times a day and break the english language? “yo, wat up to da homiez, gett att mee when u hav a chanz”
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when this post should children log off
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No it is predigest, these are simply ideas that they believe white girls do. If they said something like I hate white people that would be raciest.
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prejudiced.
racist.
…yikes. Please don’t vote or make babies.
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i did some of these things and I’m a man… No, that applies to lots of us… Perhaps the white girl who wrote it sees the world from her own lenses… That’s all
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maybe you are secretly a chick
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or “he” just really wants to be “she”?
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> Parce que, Je suis tres intelligente!!
Intelligence can’t replace a french keyboard when you only have an US keyboard and you need to put an accent on a “e”.
Fortunately, because you’re intelligent, the title of your article can catch the attention of a french who will offer you the right french letter in the right full sentence :
Parce que je suis très intelligente!!
Now the question is :
Est-ce que vous êtes assez intelligente pour copier-coller la phrase corrigée dans votre article en remplacement de la phrase défectueuse ?
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I think we all know what she was trying to say here…..geez.
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a US keyboard instead of an US keyboard, since we seem to be spell checking.
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Mais oui.
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Hey, fun. So we all got the joke, right?
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‘a’ US keyboard & ‘an’ e…. Before you criticize the damn accent check your English grammar
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Oooooh BURN!
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It is definitely possible to add the accent…”é” you just need to be intelligent enough to know how.
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I don’t think they were holding up the girl posting the status as actually intelligent. The French is supposed to be simplistic. It looks like something you’d learn in your first French class.
So I think it’s hypothetical white girl’s error, not the authors’.
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Really Awesome collections, i laughed while i realize every lines are became very true,
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I think someone stole this from you and reposted….
http://failbook.failblog.org/2011/12/07/funny-facebook-fails-15-things-white-girls-love-to-do-on-facebook/
Just wanted to let you know because that’s rude and unfair. :(
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this is rather wrong lol.
you dont have to be white to do all of these.
ima maori girl(brown) & ive done a few of these things.
as for the comments about this bein racist. GET OVER IT PEOPLE!
every race is discriminated against at some point ! its just how the world is.
elsewhere there are people callin middle eastern people terrorists & people callin black people poor & all that. same with other races ! that is all.
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This was pretty interesting to read; I used to do some of these things on MySpace, but I mostly do these on my blog now. :P
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You’re so refined now. Barf.
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Please if this stated “black girls” every black person would scream racism!!!! Boo hoo!!!
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Blablabla fart blart schmart splork. You’ve got to be trying really hard to turn this piece into some kind of double standard racism thing.
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No blacks really wouldn’t…especially if they are good jokes and not stupid watermelon type jokes… i would love to find a black person with a watermelon in there fridge..not so common. Those are the jokes that make people scream, cuz there not funny or true…
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Go to ghetto parts of Atlanta where you see a watermelon stand on almost every corner, and a black person is selling them, and a black person is buying them. I actually saw a woman get out of her car at a red light just to grab a watermelon….It was a great laugh!!!! And yes he is right, is the title of this was about a black woman, the race card would be pulled and the article would probably be pulled. That’s a FACT
But the author didn’t include the women of all races who do the duck face, it’s not cute, and it makes you look trashy….js.
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1. Black people make fun of each other all the time. As do many other races.
2. The only way I’d get pissed is if the post was done by a White person with no new material. How many kool-aid, fried chicken watermelon, baby daddy/mama, etc. jokes do we need regurgitated.
3. Ooh, girl, this my song!
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Thanks for the inside information…. keep sharing :)
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I have to say I’m guilty of doing some them… and thats why I quit facebook.
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If you think this is racist then you guys are going to hate her follow-up article: “15 Reasons Why White Girls Like The Blacks”
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It may have been mentioned; but you can include hand hearts and hand stars with friends… Awesome post!
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“Then stopping by the gyno.” Haha, nice.
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What about all the zoongaloos???
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some of us white girls can speak two languages, nothing to do with intelligence. Maybe you should get some
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Uh oh… looks like someone touched a nerve
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….She wrote in two languages, too.
Reading comprehension. Maybe you should get some.
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it is talking anout white girls being dumb, i dont get why any other race would want to be named on this list? You want to be counted as dumb to?
Just laugh at the silly a$$ white chicks and be glad your not one.
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It
about
dumb. I don’t
list.
too?
you’re
Congratulations on making more than 2 mistakes per sentence while calling someone dumb.
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Oh my goodness! I love that you just pointed out all those horrific mistakes that even a third-grader shouldn’t make!
*hugs to thee!*
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Anonymous at 12:30am –
You’re my hero.
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and every time the word ends in “ist”, we have to confront that opinion, too. Love the comments more than the post.
This was the best comment so far. Awesome. I got a whole days worth of humor in less than 10 minutes. Thank You.
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You’re also my hero lol
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it’s *too, not to.
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While humorous, change the word White to Black and then all of a sudden you have a crap storm on your hands….Why the hate on white girls but not someone of the darker pigmentation?
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my thoughts exactly
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Because it’s really not that serious.
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Since the author states that she is white and her white friend compiled the list they are clearly making fun of themselves. If they were making fun of another race then yes issue. Also, no where does it say that white girls exclusively do these things.
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Seriously. Are we really trying to be such a PC society that we can’t even make fun of ourselves anymore?? People need to chill out.
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what about posting nausatingly sappy positivisms over dreamy back grounds that all their friends seem to have found online on exactly the same day.
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Why can’t it just be 15 things PEOPLE do on Facebook? Why does it have to be white girls? I don’t do any of this stupidity and I am a white girl. RACISM.
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Wow, you have an amazing sense of humor…I bet you’re just tons of fun. Lighten the eff up.
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dude….sftu already.
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I have noticed most of this from my friends on FB; the constant talk about alcohol, the awful cell phone pics that “try to look sexy” needing color corection and the references to their annoying husband, boyfriend and/or kid. Just be yourself, ladies. I like you the way you are and I notice you.
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Excellent! I’d say more, jurI must get my prescriptions & gas tank filled.
Y
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You forgot about picture of chicks doing ‘duckface’ which makes them look ugly as hell.
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I second the duckface comment. This should have been #1.
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BAAAHAHAHAHHA…. FUNNY!!!! So guilty of some of these things..
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This is a hilarious and all-too-accurate post! You obviously have a great sense of humor despite (or maybe in part because of) your medical issues. By the way, I’m happy to say that I have not done most of these things, though I am a white girl/woman–not sure if I can call myself a girl any more!
As for the racial firestorm this has set off–get over it, people!
By the way, I read your About page. Monty is a great name for a dog, and he is super cute.
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and he fetches a mean stick
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I loooooove this! The 15 things were funny. The comments were even funnier. People getting on their high horse about racism, yet seeminly totally ok with sexism (i.e. why not just say “women” and not “white women”). Ah its a shame when the world gets too scared to say things. We all sterotype. It is a short cut for our brains. Its human nature. We do it. It is harmful when we act on these sterotypes that are either 1) mostly incorrect 2) can marginalise groups, particularly those already marginalised,etc. But it doesn’t mean sterotypes don’t exist. It doesn’t mean that when we say “white women on facebook” or “black women on facebook” or “latino women on facebook” that we don’t conjure up certain thoughts, make certain judgements. If these sterotypes are used in this way it provides both a) comic relief (via the ability to laugh at ourselves [this women says she fits this category so I am assuming she is white and a women and is on facebook and does many of these things] and our ability to laugh at others, in a ligh-hearted non-threatening way and b) on a more serious level, it does provide us with some insight, via the eyes of a self-proclaimed “insider” into the world of white women on facebook.
So, now that I have just made myself souns like a total douche, I want to say, just enjoy the laugh and stop being so tense and intense, relax and have a laugh at ourselves (human kind), not everytime someone says white or black they are being racist. Not everytime they say women or men they are being sexist. Not everytime they say girl or boy they are being agist… ;P
Enjoyed the post muchly, cheers.
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I’m white and a woman and on Facebook. This is funny. Not just Tracy Morgan can throw out jokes making fun of oneself.
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LOLOLOLOL
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Funny.I can add a few to this list
vizunmark.deco-shirts.com
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This is so incredibly accurate.
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white chicks dressed like hoochie mamas taking pictures in the bathroom on there cell phones with the duck face and peace sign.
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their
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Really it should just be “Stupid Things Teenage Girls do on Facebook”.
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Teenage? You can’t honestly think teenage girls are the only offenders. Try again.
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i’ll second this one. not to mention 80% of said demographic can’t use proper grammar or spelling, and thus also resort to ridiculous texting shorthand …. such as, “ikr” for “i know right”, “ihu” for “i hate you”, etc, etc. i only know this nugget because i have a few teen/pre-teen cousins that are super guilty of this.
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You should try capitalizing a few letters before criticizing someone else’s grammar.
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Loved this list!!! I’m guilty of doing some of these things…oops!
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Only numbers 6, 7, and 8 are specific to white women
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Don’t forget taking pictures in toothpaste spray covered mirrors in the bathroom
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I know right, that is one of my number one complaints
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Its all true.. i’ll shamelessly admit it LOL
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hahahaha I am guilty of a majority of these things. What about hands on hips/lean forward to show more clavicle?! Its popular with teenagers these days
http://spotthestereotype.wordpress.com (for funny lists like the one fibromy-awesome posted!)
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i like that one
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you forgot “friend request any girl who adds their BF or posts on his wall”
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then it would be 16 things white girls do on FB and not 15..durrrr
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I just like to procrastinate on facebook, but I don’t think that’s a racial thing ;)
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Any references to skin color would be racial when the color of the skin has nothing to do with the content. Why would only white girls and not girls in general do these things or boys for that matter
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humor dude. humor.
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This article was purely written for comedic purposes. Good job on taking it way too seriously. I recommend that you never watch South Park, your head might explode.
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the reason why racism persists in our society is because it is acceptable in our humor. It is through comedy that racism has an active life and contributes to the ugliness and injustice in our society. Just because it’s a joke doesn’t make it alright.
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What would have happened if someone wrote an article with the title, “15 Things Black Girls Do on Facebook”? Can you say, Al Sharpton?!?!
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“the reason why racism persists in our society is because it is acceptable in our humor. It is through comedy that racism has an active life and contributes to the ugliness and injustice in our society. Just because it’s a joke doesn’t make it alright.”
*exasperated sigh* there are multiple types of racial humor. they can be broken into (roughly) two camps: the kind specifically and purposely meant to hurt (say, a racist white person spitefully telling a n***** joke); and the kind meant to make you think about your own ideals and actions and make fun of you / make you uncomfortable about it / make you laugh at yourself.
obviously some racial humor is ugly, but you clearly don’t watch enough stand-up comedians to be able to tell the difference. i for one and grateful for the dave chappelles and chris rocks of the world.
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Huh, i could have sworn i was mexican, but after reading this, i have to face the fact that i might indeed be white. LOL
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LMAO!
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Dreams do come true!! Congratulations
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‘LMAO’ @Elia and @Dave.
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If you are going to take pictures of your feet – please – prune your hooves. Having long fingernails is attractive. Not trimming your toes is disgusting. It’s gross and ugly.
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Having long fingernails is not attractive. It’s gross and ugly and sometimes painful.
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Are there really still parts of the world where the phrase or conceptual generalisation, ‘white girls’ is actually acceptable?
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If someone is talking about the age range that fits the word “girl” and white females at the same time, then yes.
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Why? Do you mean that girls of the same age but with other skin colors would not do these things?
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It’s meant to be ironic, and the author mentions that she indeed fits in this generalization. Sheesh. Not a big deal.
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When someone wants to describe the tendencies of the white female who falls in the age range that is “girl”, what else would you have them say? “15 Things White Females, whose age ranges from 15-35, Love To Do On Facebook”? Relax and view this article for the comedic purposes that it was written.
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Well said. I’m black, do half these things and think this article is hilarious!
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reverse racism crybaby. has to be a tea party gimp.
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OMG, Karen, you can’t just ask people why they’re white
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OMG, worst movie ever, lol!!
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ohhh nooooo angry white girl alert!
do you feel the same way about phrases like “black people” or “asian dudes”? if not, then feel free to STFU by gagging on your own hypocrisy, thanks :))
sincerely,
a white girl.
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from dear darcy isla’s blog:
“Call me pretentious, but a large part of me would still happily forsake other dreams in order to marry some fop named something like Prince William, and expect our visitors from the lower echelons of society to enter the room and be struck by the resemblance to the second series of Green Wing.”
ahahahahahaha!
explains everything. hahahaha. so good.
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There’s no need to attack me and my own writing, taken out of context, on here. I think it’s fine to question these things, especially as there seems to be no correct way to discuss issues like race anymore. I think the term ‘white girls’ just has a lot of stigma around it due to how it’s been used. I’m not a crusader, I just think it’s worth working out bad habits in our thought patterns. This article may be meant ironically, but it reminds me of similar bad habits to those discussed here: http://fightapathyordont.com/?p=1689
I’m aware that people are flawed and to be honest all the time inevitably involves an element of hypocrisy, but I strive when I can to stick to my principles, and… the term ‘white girls’ just really jarrs with me. I won’t apologise for that, I’m just surprised that it’s in use and so acceptable, celebrated even, on such a huge network like WordPress.
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Yes, I think this is true :D Lol
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I believe I’ve seen every single one of these listed items from my “friends”. Too funny!!
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some men can be accused of doing the exact same things. posting excitement about what they will be eating for dinner every night; posting overly-dramatic statuses about who they’re mad at, being very specific about it; pictures of cars (*sigh*)… don’t know any other examples, i had to “hide” them all!
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omgg the whole dear …. is soo true!! likee who are you talkinn to? the weather doesn’t see this.. the cafeteria doesn’t see thiss .. whooo are you posting this for?
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Or what about commenting on their not-so -attractive friends writing lies like “aaaw you’re so beautiful<3" ?
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This made me crack up.
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Was a good read! Made me laugh
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So after all of this, ya gonna give us your facebook link? I want to friend ya
val :)
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Haha, this is great, I particularly like number 13 :L
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You have forgotten the phrase….
“I am so over…..”
That is a classic white girl facebook phrase
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HA. funny. I added you to a list of stuff to read when you need a laugh.
http://www.skinnyscoop.com/list/fawnda/nsfw-when-you-need-a-laugh
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Love all these sites!
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Let’s not forget about posting pictures of themselves while driving.. Is it safe to take pictures while driving anyway?
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This post is funny and sad. Are women really this banal? I’ll have to take your word for it since I am not on Face Book now or in the future. Between reality television and some social networking sites, I think the collective American IQ has dropped too many notches.
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HA. Very funny. I just added your post to this a “when you need a laugh” list.
http://www.skinnyscoop.com/list/fawnda/nsfw-when-you-need-a-laugh.
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Hilarious. Thanks for the study break! Now back to Facebook. Ha.
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Perhaps the reason it says “white girls” is because she is a white girl, and most of her friends are probably white girls. You write what you know about. If a white girl had written about black girls, asian girls or hispanic girls there would have been an uproar about that.
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What has skin color got to do with anything?
It is the outside of the skin. Everything else in the body is the same for all the female population on earth
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You are incredible annoying… just enjoy something that is funny and leave your stupid bull shit out of it
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She is not saying there is any difference. In her opinion/experiences this is what white girls do.
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Rastaphoto got tolddddd
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dude, no one here’s gonna fuck you. that tactic is best reserved for liberal arts campuses. pussy.
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zzzzzzzz
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You bethcha! One of the many reasons that I left FB. Had been waiting all along for a “who gives a flying f*ck” button! ha ha
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who cares if you left facebook. you’re just as big an attention whore as the people on facebook you complain about. only, u use forums like this to get your fix of attention because u can remain anon. on facebook everyone knows your a loser and ignores u.
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harsh
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Hahaha owned
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there is a “who gives a flying f*ck” button … its called “block” or “ignore”. i agree with the other comments … get a life and get over your self-righteous self.
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Haha. Funny! I am totally guilty of many of the things on your list as are most of my facebook friends. Too cute.
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Great! I liked number 15. Girls always do that… don´t know why…
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Complaining about the service in a restaurant is what zoongaloos do, more than white girls
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You forgot pics with the “duck face”
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stop bitching about her saying white girls. not that big of a deal. not everyone bases their lives off of being politically correct to save your feelings. grow a pair. she didnt mean it like that. jeez.
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still just the use of skin color is unnecessary since people of all color does the same thing
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I guess not in her opinion. Free speech, these are her thoughts.
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Wow, really? Get off it already…we get your point.
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dude, what. are you looking for a race riot? it’s two doors down
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Haha! this is funny & so true :’)
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thats fine since they like to do this lol
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So will u do another classification between races? As a Latina I am curious what my peoples… las mujeres post…
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Haha. Definitely guilty of food posts but usually they’re more worthy than oatmeal. All true but gotta agree with a load of the comments I’ve seen this from girls of many a race.
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Myself as well… but I love to bake!
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I thought you left FB…
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This is completely racist and ridiculous,. Why can’t it say “women”? Why does it have to be “White Women”? What would people think if it said “Black Women”?
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cuzz black thugettes be typin lyk diz insted
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hahahahahaha AWESOME!
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OMG you are so awesome (being totally serious) that made me laugh so hard in the middle of a meeting.
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Unfortunately, being a black women I have to agree with this. Pisses me off. @Jessica – its humor, get over yourself.
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You’re a lame white woman. While racism is generally used in broader terms, I am specifically talking about you.
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Because it is actually true that it is white women.
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because if it were stupid things black women do on facebook we’d be here all night.
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“because if it were stupid things black women do on facebook we’d be here all night.”
wow…racist people hide behind sheets!!! Only a coward that makes a post like this anonymously. The original post was made by a white girl ABOUT what she believes white girls do. As usual, someone STILL has to find a way to f*** with black people. TYPICAL.
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Your dum
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You’re dumb
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BTW, that would be “YOU’RE (AKA you are) dumb”….just so you don’t look so dumb next time yourself!
Lighten up people! It’s funny…stop reading so much into the stupid title!!
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It’s ironic that you said “your dum.” it’s supposed to say, “you’re dumb.”
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“your dum” Black girl???
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Dumb*
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Why does everything have to be about race? Take it easy Jessica.
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Hahahaha. Burns doesn’t it? Calm down. Generalizing a group on facebook is hardly a call for the white Al Sharpton. If everybody wants to tell black people to get over racism in the spectrum of comedy, then white folks should be able to survive the ‘great facebook roast’ of 2011 without being too fragile.
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AGREE!! like 100000% and more. If white people can’t handle something as stupid as this (but they can handle jokes specifically created about whites or specific hair colors without flipping out) then why the hell should we try to make other people get over racism? THIS post right here doesn’t even scream anything racist at all so making a big deal about it because the title says “white girls” is like making a big deal because someone says its gonna rain…
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Thank you
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Perhaps most black chicks can post better, more exciting things than what are on the list, thus making them better at facebook.
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Blacks in general are too stupid to use machines or language. There’s a reason why no black society in history invented a wheel or written language.
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Thomas, you’re an idiot. Because there were written languages and wheels in africa 1000s of years ago. Racism is formed from stupidity stupid. You don’t know enough about a certain group of people to form a different opinion about someone other than what mommy and daddy told you and what you see on TV. What is your IQ anyway?
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It isn’t racist, it is stereotypical, and funny as all get out. Racist would be if she said, “15 things cracker girls love to do on Facebook.” I’m a white girl and proud of it! Come on, Jessica, just read the list and laugh a little.
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The total reason we need a “I don’t give a f**k” button. LOL – it was written to be funny – get the hell over yourself. JEEZ
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This is hilarious!
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funny, and oh, so true! i’m guilty of several. luckily, in my progressively maturing state (so i say), i’ve chilled on the sucky postings. kinda.
http://www.icouldntmakethisshitup.wordpress.com
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Oh…my…Gawd (white Valley Girl), come on, y’all (white girl fake southern talk). This is truly WHITE girls. I should know. I am one. Quite being so politically correct. If the shoes fits (take a picture!), man up and suck it in.
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And after you take a picture of the shoe that fits, post it up on facebook! LOL!
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LMAO! And now we’ve come full circle.
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oh no joke. why is talking “hard” and “gangsta”, and following the stereotypical uneducated street slang also suddenly the cool thing for white kids to do? of course, in addition to the “duckface”, peace signs, and dressing like trailer trash. talk about one step forward and 30 steps back.
i suppose it really isn’t much different than the fake southern drawl and the valley girl accents. kids’ gonna try to fit in somewhere. i just wish they’d fit into books more. *sigh* lol
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Haha what a funny list! All so true!
And yet I forgive them because white girls are so cute lol
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maybe “I shall write a book about this, some when in the future…” is number 16. on the list? ;)
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How about changing their relationship status to “Married”…. to one of their friends?
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I just threw up a little in my mouth. Your list was full of many annoying (and frustratingly ACCURATE) posts…thanks for the laugh…
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Too funny…but why is it only white chicks?…
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You forgot to put most girls take a pic of the gaper…
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I also love how every girl acts like she’s the first person who’s ever gotten sick. Actual example of a FB friend’s current status, “Take medicine , sleep, more medicine , try to function in the world , somewhat fail, more medicine, more sleep.” The ones where they thank the men in their lives for bringing them soup and such are particularly annoying (much like #3 on this list).
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All of this is so true, and not just of white girls.
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No, it is mostly white girls.
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Would there be a difference if the girl has brown, yellow or any other color of skin?
Why not just – What girls….
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there would be a difference … and in that case, the author would’ve said brown girls, yellow girls, plaid girls. man, this wasn’t racist if the post is a person talking about her own race, idiot. lol
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This is so funny, I hope your book gets done and published. I’d buy!
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You forgot the duck face!!!!! Could fall into the “hard” category
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What the crap is up with the duck face?!? I will never understand and I am okay with that.
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Perhaps MySpace face is a better term? The puckered lips, to the side, throwing up deuces…
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Bahaha so true. I know lots of people (myself included) who are guilty of trying to look “hard” while simultaneously looking super preppy. Funny post! Congrats on being pressed!
arbohl.wordpress.com
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Most of these are entirely true, although I would point out that oatmeal is quite delicious and far from undeserving. :P
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great list, no words truer. will you go to prom with me? :-)
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i think you forgot ‘posting pictures of inane things using instagram’…which i do all the time. sincerely, a black girl that is guilty of ALL of these things.
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Great work! Clever and brilliant!
Who says Facebook users aren’t smart?
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Like some men aren’t
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yeah fb
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White Girl 1: I miss your face!
White Girl 2: I miss your face, too… Can’t wait to see you, Lover
Note… They are not actually lovers… Until they finish that second bottle of wine.
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“white” wine…
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